Well it's steaming hot here, just like Summer, only I'm trying not take it for granted, as I'm sure we'll revert to chilly days again. It's weird, but the heat is making the lockdown even quieter. When I step outside my door there's a sort of stillness, a desert feeling - I can't explain it any better than that - and I half expect to see weary, thirsty travellers making their way to my door. In fact, I already have a visitor in the shape of Big Grandson, who is staying for a few days just for a change. And it's true to say that he is always thirsty, and hungry, though not exactly weary as he doesn't do much except "chill" and chat away on his phone with his mates. He has been an exceptionally good guest, very grateful for every meal and drink, and as Daughter supplied me with a bag of food for his visit, I haven't had to do any big shopping. He is actually very good company, which is not bad for a teenage boy (due to be 16 on 30th of this month). We have taken a bit of gentle exercise and played a few games of Poker (he was given a Poker set for an early Birthday present) and tonight he is going to be my partner in the Virtual Pub Quiz. This will be very exciting for me as I have been playing on my own (with 180,000 other people, virtually) for the last three weeks. Daughter and her Partner also play, and the Spanish contingent of Son, Partner and Little Grandson with any luck. It doesn't start until 8.15, so is a bit late for Son and Co as they're an hour ahead. Anyway, we shall see if they join us. I'm expecting great things.
It's odd, but I'm feeling rather tired and achy generally. This is extremely annoying as I don't normally give in to this kind of feeling. Maybe it's just the Virus getting to me - I don't mean literally, but it's the Lockdown and the general doom and gloom. Ah well, I'm off to put a pizza in the oven and sip a glass of Rose Spritzer before the Quiz. Let's hope Grandson brings me luck : )
Showing posts with label Grandson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grandson. Show all posts
Thursday, May 21, 2020
Saturday, September 21, 2019
Any way the wind blows..doesn't really matter.. to me.
Oh dear! I'm totally bewildered..where am I going? , I can't believe I'm still in Shoreham, but I am and I think that most of my friends and family are both fed up and frustrated that I seem unable to make a move, or even a decision.
On the face of it, it shouldn't be difficult: I don't want to stay here, I want to live somewhere warm and I would like a house near the sea, with a garden, a pool and enough room to do bed and breakfast so that I can keep my head above water, financially. Surely that's not a huge ask, and I should have enough money to do that either in Spain, near Barcelona or in France, near the border.
It sounds very simple doesn't it, so why am I making such a meal of it?
When I said to Son that I needed a plan, he said "Well make a plan Mum" and of course that's where I fall down, because I would really like some help with making the plan, and they are all too busy with their own lives to sort me out! Naturally enough. Daughter would help if she had the time too, but she doesn't really want me to move to warmer climes, so that is not really helpful.
Yesterday I had what I thought was a brilliant idea, which was to put a message out into the Universe to see if anyone would care to "Share a Chateau"... sounds like a brilliant idea to me, if I could only think how to do it. I would love a small Chateau where I could live and do my B and B, but I would need a partner who could do the DIY or whatever was needed. We could share the costs and the living accommodation, and divide the labour according to our skills. I'm really good at the design bits and making it look lovely, And I'm not bad at the cooking and welcoming guests (I've done a bit of that in the past), My partner would have to be up for the practical stuff like cutting logs and grass and taking care of general repairs. I think it could work. What do you think?
Of course, there would have to be a 50/50 investment and all the legalities would have to be sewn up tight. Perhaps it's too much to hope for a like-minded soul, but just maybe there is someone out there. I need to give it some more thought, so I'm airing it here as a possibility. Who knows, it might work.
On a different note, Big Grandson went on a school trip this week to the Large Hadron Collider at Cern in Switzerland. It was a (very long) day trip. They left at 4 am for Gatwick, flew to Geneva and then went on to Cern in a coach. It was apparently the most wonderful experience, and Grandson was hugely impressed by both its vast size and the complex physics of the thing. It is apparently the biggest machine in the World!! They went underground to see where the particles are whizzed around in a 17 mile circular tunnel at great speeds until they collide and produce yet more particles or atoms. I don't pretend to comprehend it, but it is rather wonderful and is helping us (or rather them) to understand our Universe better. Anyway Grandson loved it and came home with a Large Hadron Collider orange hardhat (cost 8 Swiss Francs) and some postcards to remember it by. They arrived safely back at midnight, absolutely shattered.
On the face of it, it shouldn't be difficult: I don't want to stay here, I want to live somewhere warm and I would like a house near the sea, with a garden, a pool and enough room to do bed and breakfast so that I can keep my head above water, financially. Surely that's not a huge ask, and I should have enough money to do that either in Spain, near Barcelona or in France, near the border.
It sounds very simple doesn't it, so why am I making such a meal of it?
When I said to Son that I needed a plan, he said "Well make a plan Mum" and of course that's where I fall down, because I would really like some help with making the plan, and they are all too busy with their own lives to sort me out! Naturally enough. Daughter would help if she had the time too, but she doesn't really want me to move to warmer climes, so that is not really helpful.
Yesterday I had what I thought was a brilliant idea, which was to put a message out into the Universe to see if anyone would care to "Share a Chateau"... sounds like a brilliant idea to me, if I could only think how to do it. I would love a small Chateau where I could live and do my B and B, but I would need a partner who could do the DIY or whatever was needed. We could share the costs and the living accommodation, and divide the labour according to our skills. I'm really good at the design bits and making it look lovely, And I'm not bad at the cooking and welcoming guests (I've done a bit of that in the past), My partner would have to be up for the practical stuff like cutting logs and grass and taking care of general repairs. I think it could work. What do you think?
Of course, there would have to be a 50/50 investment and all the legalities would have to be sewn up tight. Perhaps it's too much to hope for a like-minded soul, but just maybe there is someone out there. I need to give it some more thought, so I'm airing it here as a possibility. Who knows, it might work.
On a different note, Big Grandson went on a school trip this week to the Large Hadron Collider at Cern in Switzerland. It was a (very long) day trip. They left at 4 am for Gatwick, flew to Geneva and then went on to Cern in a coach. It was apparently the most wonderful experience, and Grandson was hugely impressed by both its vast size and the complex physics of the thing. It is apparently the biggest machine in the World!! They went underground to see where the particles are whizzed around in a 17 mile circular tunnel at great speeds until they collide and produce yet more particles or atoms. I don't pretend to comprehend it, but it is rather wonderful and is helping us (or rather them) to understand our Universe better. Anyway Grandson loved it and came home with a Large Hadron Collider orange hardhat (cost 8 Swiss Francs) and some postcards to remember it by. They arrived safely back at midnight, absolutely shattered.
Saturday, February 17, 2018
"Men may come and men may go..."
"... But children are forever"
Those wise words were spoken by an old friend of mine, many years ago when all of our children were pretty young. And the words came from our experiences. We were reflecting, in our relative maturity, on the ephemeral nature of our (failed) relationships with husbands and lovers, when compared with the lifelong commitment that bringing up children requires.
Of course, this was a long time ago and, sadly, our friendship didn't last either. But I have been reminded of just those feelings by what is happening with Daughter right now. She has dived into
yet another relationship and I am watching from the sidelines and can't help noticing that Grandson seems to be getting the short end of the stick. He is 13, and I know how tricky the teenage years are, but the nice house, which was meant for Daughter, Grandson and little Granddaughter to live in while they recovered a bit from the previous failed relationship, is now stuffed full with new Man plus his three children (not full time at least) and a dog. It's just too much and it is getting to Grandson. He is having to share his bedroom with new Man's 18 yr old, (who is perfectly nice,but virtually a stranger) in what is an already overcrowded space, and is also being compared, unfavourably, with the new Man's children, He has been to stay with me for a couple of days over half term, just to get a bit of peace - but of course he eventually wants to go back home because he loves his Mum and misses her. I do worry about him, and I know that Daughter is trying to keep everything together. I hope she puts her children first - though you may disagree with me - I just know how hard it is for children to adapt with regard to adult relationships. I can see that the "new Man" is getting his feet under the table, and probably sees Grandson as the opposition! And that I can't bear.
I delivered Grandson back home last evening and literally watched him change as we got closer. I was driving, but I could feel the tension in him. It was as if he was putting on armour in readiness for the encounter. Poor lad, at 13 he's absolutely not equipped to deal with competition for his Mother's affections (and that is surely what it is). I think it's all too much.
I probably feel worse about it because I am about to go off to Barcelona again for a prolonged stay and I worry that Grandson will be unhappy while I'm away. Of course I may be wrong (I usually am) but I think that expecting young boys to "get on with it" and "man up" is the worst possible thing for them. Just when they are becoming aware of their emotions, it tells them to smother their feelings and can only lead to more failed relationships in the future, and to emotional upheavals of one sort or another. I do know that whatever one does can be construed as 'wrong' just because they need rebellion of some sort. But I want to avoid permanent damage for Grandson - he has had so much upheaval in his young life already: his Mum has had so many boyfriends, he has had too many potential "Dads" (and two real ones), he has moved both house and school so many times that I feel he has too much bubbling under the surface that is bound to come out at some time.
I just hope it doesn't happen when I'm away -at least if I'm around to pick up the pieces it might help.
Of course all this is what I would say to Daughter if we could just sit down together and talk calmly about the situation. Alas, I lack the courage. She is my baby and so I love her unconditionally. If I do interfere I will only be in the wrong again, and she will tell me that everything is fine,
Oh for a magic wand to wave!
Those wise words were spoken by an old friend of mine, many years ago when all of our children were pretty young. And the words came from our experiences. We were reflecting, in our relative maturity, on the ephemeral nature of our (failed) relationships with husbands and lovers, when compared with the lifelong commitment that bringing up children requires.
Of course, this was a long time ago and, sadly, our friendship didn't last either. But I have been reminded of just those feelings by what is happening with Daughter right now. She has dived into
yet another relationship and I am watching from the sidelines and can't help noticing that Grandson seems to be getting the short end of the stick. He is 13, and I know how tricky the teenage years are, but the nice house, which was meant for Daughter, Grandson and little Granddaughter to live in while they recovered a bit from the previous failed relationship, is now stuffed full with new Man plus his three children (not full time at least) and a dog. It's just too much and it is getting to Grandson. He is having to share his bedroom with new Man's 18 yr old, (who is perfectly nice,but virtually a stranger) in what is an already overcrowded space, and is also being compared, unfavourably, with the new Man's children, He has been to stay with me for a couple of days over half term, just to get a bit of peace - but of course he eventually wants to go back home because he loves his Mum and misses her. I do worry about him, and I know that Daughter is trying to keep everything together. I hope she puts her children first - though you may disagree with me - I just know how hard it is for children to adapt with regard to adult relationships. I can see that the "new Man" is getting his feet under the table, and probably sees Grandson as the opposition! And that I can't bear.
I delivered Grandson back home last evening and literally watched him change as we got closer. I was driving, but I could feel the tension in him. It was as if he was putting on armour in readiness for the encounter. Poor lad, at 13 he's absolutely not equipped to deal with competition for his Mother's affections (and that is surely what it is). I think it's all too much.
I probably feel worse about it because I am about to go off to Barcelona again for a prolonged stay and I worry that Grandson will be unhappy while I'm away. Of course I may be wrong (I usually am) but I think that expecting young boys to "get on with it" and "man up" is the worst possible thing for them. Just when they are becoming aware of their emotions, it tells them to smother their feelings and can only lead to more failed relationships in the future, and to emotional upheavals of one sort or another. I do know that whatever one does can be construed as 'wrong' just because they need rebellion of some sort. But I want to avoid permanent damage for Grandson - he has had so much upheaval in his young life already: his Mum has had so many boyfriends, he has had too many potential "Dads" (and two real ones), he has moved both house and school so many times that I feel he has too much bubbling under the surface that is bound to come out at some time.
I just hope it doesn't happen when I'm away -at least if I'm around to pick up the pieces it might help.
Of course all this is what I would say to Daughter if we could just sit down together and talk calmly about the situation. Alas, I lack the courage. She is my baby and so I love her unconditionally. If I do interfere I will only be in the wrong again, and she will tell me that everything is fine,
Oh for a magic wand to wave!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
