Remembrance Sunday.

Today has been a beautifully warm and sunny day - what a contrast with many Remembrance Sundays; so often it is grey, rainy and very cold - the sort of weather that makes us think of those poor young men in the trenches in both the terrible World Wars. They were soaked to the skin, often sick, always hungry and in fear for their lives, with no hope of home comforts, and so many of them never to see home again. It never fails to make me cry. The poems of Wilfred Owem are so explicit in describing the suffering those men and boys endured - and I find it all the more amazing that he could actually write poetry about it - one thinks of poetry generally as refined somehow, lifting the soul and casting a kind of spell over the world. But in his case, the dreadful conditions and the suffering are all too clear:

" Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge..
..Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots,
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame, all blind."

This from "Dulce et Decorum Est", for me the most moving of his poems which tells so clearly what horror War was, and is. God help us when we think that men still go to war, fight and kill each other. I'm tempted to say, "For what?" Yet I know that those brave (and not so brave) men believed in what they were doing - at least until the horror and futility of it overwhelmed them. Or until it killed them. But I'm afraid it will never make sense to me.

On a brighter note, Daughter, Grandson and I whizzed off to the Car Boot Sale at the Marina this morning. It was the most perfect day, and we pottered, bought a few things, shared a bacon sarnie and generally enjoyed the sunshine. Then we came back here to sit in the sun - at least Daughter sat in the sun while and Grandson played with the boys next door and I finished off the outstanding gardening jobs. I have dug over the new vegetable bed, moved the herbacious plants to their new homes and replanted all the spring bulbs which had been displaced. Fantastic. I've even planted a few raspberry canes, and the purple sprouting broccoli plants given to me by my Aristocratic BF. I'm planning a couple of rows of potatoes,some parsnips, spinach and carrots, and then some salad crops, like radish and lettuce or mixed leaves. I'm also going to fill a pot with nasturtiums (we can eat the leaves, flowers and seeds) and plant sweet peas (inedible but gorgeous) on some trellis along the back of the rows. It's a nice plan, and I only hope I can make it work.

First Birthday Beano...

As I walked this morning, the sea was flat and grey, covered by a grey blanket of sky. A moist and misty Monday morning (jolly good alliteration, I think!) which reminded me of one of my truly terrible jokes which used to make the children groan: "Tomorrow will be Muggy, followed by Tue-gy, We-gy, Thur-gy and Fri-gy." I know, dreadful, but it used to make us laugh. Actually, the joke originated from Bob Monkhouse, years ago, and he did have some awful jokes...

Enough of that, what I really wanted to tell you was how Beanie's Christening and First Birthday Party went. Yesterday morning we all drove to the pictureque little church of St Peter in Upper Beeding for the ceremony, which was part of the normal morning service. I must say that I have never been to an "Anglican high church" service before. It was all greek to me - I didn't know any of the responses and so couldn't really get into the swing of it. I sang the hymns though - at least the ones I knew, and enjoyed the sight of Beanie crawling very fast up to the altar and getting in on the act. The actual baptism itself was lovely and Beanie seemed to enjoy it. Afterwards we all had coffee in the church hall before driving back for the festivities at home. Lovely Downstairs Neighbour had organised food and drinks (despite having a stomach bug the day before and no sleep for about a week). I made jellies and did a few sausage rolls, another friend made some perfect cup cakes and LDN (excuse the abbreviation) had managed to produce a gorgeous Birthday cake, iced with a little boat on the top and some candles. Loads of her family were there, plus the usual suspects, friendwise, so it was a very jolly gathering, and Beanie resolutely refused to sleep in case he might miss some of the fun! Of course it's not actually his Birthday until tomorrow (8th), so we have to have another little gathering to sing Happy Birthday again and actually cut the cake. I'm looking forward to that.

Had a gorgeous cup of hot chocolate with another BBF this morning, in our new Patisserie Valerie in Hove. Poor BBF is having a horrible time recently because her husband is very ill. I try and see her once a week to cheer her up a bit, but I don't know how much good it does! She is looking very thin and worried (naturally enough). Patisserie Valerie is a huge temptation; the pastries and fruit tarts are just divine, and I noticed this morning that they had those little Portuguese custard tarts I love so much. Next time I'm definitely having one; just don't mention the diet...

I see two ships...

This morning the sea was different again - it's never quite the same twice, and when I walk most mornings there is usually something to note. Today there was a deep bluey-green, almost steely look to the water. A big tanker, leaving harbour, was moving very slowly and looked just like a black paper cutout solidly silhouetted against the flat horizon. Further along I saw a yacht with one white, billowing sail which cut through the line of the horizon like a Japanese paintbrush stroke. Very graphic. My walk was invigorating as always, and the wind was cold enough to warrant a scarf snuggled around my neck. Somehow that makes all the difference. And I so look forward to the hot shower afterwards.

Today (Saturday) is sunny but cold and as I have Grandson here I'm not walking by the sea. It's also Lovely Downstairs Neighbour's Birthday, so we're about to write her card and give her a presie. I have also volunteered to babysit for her this evening so that she can go out and celeberate with friends. That's easy-peasy because it usually involves me sitting here with a glass of wine and the baby monitor - though maybe Beanie won't be so obliging tonight! We'll see. It is going to be his 1st Birthday next month, on 8th November - I can hardly believe a whole year has gone by so quickly. He is still called Bean or Beanie, although his official name is still Gabriel. This should all be resolved when he has his Christening/Birthday Party on 6th November, Lovely Downstairs Neighbour will then finally decide on his names and the order in which they appear. As you may (or may not) recall he has been Bruno Gabriel and Gabriel Bruno, though still no-one calls him anything but Bean! It's a tricky one :-)

Half Term is upon us, and Grandson has had a very good six weeks at the new school. Yesterday there was a Harvest Cafe after school, where various cakes anad goodies were on sale. I contributed some of my Crabapple Jelly, some Spooky Cupcakes and a few other bits and pieces. It was very crowded and great fun. We ate cakes and then watched a film made by last year's Year 3. Grandson also had a brand-new, shiny gold Headmaster's Sticker, given for for his homework. All in all very satisfactory. Afterwards we went to the Skate Park for a freezing (for me) half hour. Amazing how much the weather has changed in just two weeks. Then it was home for fish and chips. I was so cold that I needed something warm to hold, at least that's my excuse...

The last Pimm's of Summer..

What a glorious week of weather we have had, culminating in two days of 30 degree temperatures this weekend. Of course we spent it on the beach, as did thousands of others here in Brighton - in fact in 9 years here I have never seen so many people out walking along the promenade and swimming in the sea. We had picnics on the beach on both Saturday and Sunday, Daughter, Grandson and I, and also swam in the sea along with everyone else. Grandson is a positive water baby and was in the sea for about three hours on Saturday and two hours on Sunday! The only thing that stopped him was the fact that he had scratched his stomach because he wouldn't stop surfing onto the shingle! In spite of the hot sun and clear blue skies, there was a lovely breeze and very big waves crashing onto the shore, so it was an exciting thing to be doing, but by Saturday evening he was really sore, and on Sunday he was pretty much black and blue. He had a good go of his Boogie Board too and that was slightly less painful. Anyway, great fun was had by all, and we retreated to my balcony at about 4pm on Sunday and sat in the sun with the last of the Pimm's, watching the sun go down. Not surprisingly, Grandson collapsed in front of the TV and we didn't hear a peep out of him. When they went home he apparently crashed out and slept like a log. We all felt that we had made the most of the glorious weekend - what a great ending to the Summer - unexpected and all the better for that.

It was also the last of the Shoreham Flyover Car Boot Sales on Sunday, and of course I didn't want to miss that. It was almost too hot to walk around, and lots of people had brought their umbrellas to use as parasols - what a good idea: I wished I had thought of it. The field was packed with sellers, right down to the bottom, and again, I had never seen so many people out and about enjoying the sunshine. We found some lovely bargains, and I saw lots of things I would have bought for my imaginary antique shop!

As I was driving back to go to the beach, Son phoned from Poland. I told him that we were enjoying Mediterranean weather and temperatures and he sounded rather envious!
They were due to fly back on Monday, so I guess they are back in London now, though I haven't heard from him yet

My students have both gone home - the unpleasant Austrian vegetarian went home on Saturday morning (hurrah), leaving her room in a disgusting state and full of rubbish for me to clear up (not that I was surprised). She was possibly the most humourless person I have ever met (and that's saying something). I didn't know that she was vegetarian until after she arrived, but gamely took it on and cooked her what I thought were inventive and varied meals for two weeks. In return I got not one "thank you", she came down later and later for breakfast every day without a word of apology, and pulled a frightful face at me when I asked her to clean her bathroom at the end of the two weeks! By contrast, the other Student was a really nice Russian man, a chemist, who was unfailingly polite and charming, and always told me if he was going to be in or out. He also took every advantage of being here in England: he made two trips to London, went on a theatre trip to see "Phantom the Opera", took coach trips to both Cambridge and Stonehenge and and spent his last Saturday going to Leeds Castle and Canterbury Cathedral. He left on Sunday morning and was obviously sad to go. Of course he left his room and bathroom immaculately clean. Ah well, students come and students go, and you never know what you're going to get.

I think that's about it.. Summer is really over now I guess. I can bring in the parasol and the geraniums from the balcony and look forward to a cosy Autumn...

Happy Birthday to Son..

Son's Birthday today - he is 32 - and he's in Warsaw with his polish girlfriend. I did get to see him on Wednesday; we had a lovely lunch sitting in the sun outside a London restaurant and I took him a couple of presies and a little birthday cake. It was great to see him looking so happy and positive, especially when I think back to last year and how deeply "in the wrong" I was for most of the summer. Ah well, life is made up of changes.

This year I feel much more positive too - which is, I think, an indicator of just how much my children mean to me: last year I was unhappy because Son didn't want to communicate with me and Daughter was not terribly happy, and having problems adjusting to being on her own again, and though Grandson wasn't too unhappy, he was certainly still feeling insecure. Now, though, Daughter is also feeling more positive and happy, the new Boyfriend is turning into a regular boyfriend, the job is turning into something she feels happy doing (though she is also thinking of doing a PGCE so that she can teach and have the same holidays as Grandson) and Grandson is happy as a flea at his new school.(Yesterday he came out positively skipping with happiness, and proudly showing off his certificate from the Headmaster, which said he's had an excellent start at Elm Grove School!) So, either I'm pathetically attached to them, or just more honest about it than most - either way, the fact is I'm happy when they're happy. Pick the bones out of that one...

Whether the weather..

There's what you might call a stiff sou'westerly blowing down by the sea today. Huge greeny-sludge coloured breakers with dirty cream tops are hurling themselves onto the shingle in a spectacular display of what looks like very bad temper. It was a magnificent sight as I dodged along, seeing very few other brave walkers. One woman I passed, wrapped against the wind and rain, said just one word as we passed and smiled at each other in complicity: "Wonderful". Indeed it was. And although it's far from gale-force winds today, I was reminded of that night in October 1987 when the whole country was lashed with 'unexpected' gales.

We were living in Cambridge then, in fact had recently moved into our new house, and the gales came as a complete surprise. Son and Daughter were then 8 and nearly 6 respectively, and as the noises from outside were so frightening, they climbed into bed with me at about 5am and we cowered under the duvet until getting up time. Our house overlooked the Cambridge Botanical Gardens, so you can probably imagine the devastation that greeted us. I think the Botanical Gardens lost about half of their mature trees that night. Closer to our home, a huge branch had been ripped from the horse chestnut tree in our garden and lay lengthwise along our balcony. Luckily it hadn't been blown crosswise, or we would have had all the windows smashed and half a tree in our sitting room. Several branches from that and other trees had been blown across our roof and into the Mews outside, but we were relatively untouched. As it turned out, we had a smallish hole in the roof which was attended to without much trouble. All the roads, parks and gardens around were littered with bits of tree and roof, and many people and houses had been injured and damaged. Several poor people died when trees landed on them or their cars or houses. And I remember that my ABF's cat-slide roof was blown right off. It was all very scary and we counted ourselves pretty lucky to only have the inconvenience of closed schools and no public transport for a couple of days. We even had a phone call from the Ex that morning, to check if we were still alive! It was probably wishful thinking on his part, but sadly for him, we were all fine. Hard to believe that was 24 years ago - history really. Let's hope these winds subside without doing too much damage.

Good news on the school front from Grandson. He has had nearly a week at the new school and seems pretty relaxed about it. I've been collecting him after school and if his responses are anything to go by, he's fine. The usual answer to the question "What did you do today?" is "Nothing".. and that's just what I've been getting. He has two new friends, plus a girlfriend (not sure of her name, but she is "beautiful") and he is eating all his packed lunch every day. So far, so good...

Perpetual Motion...

"Oh it's a long,long time from May to December" so the song goes, but we're more than half way through and time is just galloping. Now we're into September and the new School year is about to start. This means that Grandson is about to start at his new school, which will be his third in three years!! He first went to Powell Corduroy in dreaded Dorking for just over a year, then to St. Aubyn's in Rottingdean for a year and a half, and now he's due to start at Elm Grove Primary on Tuesday. He is both excited and nervous, which I really understand. And I do hope it will be a good place for him.

The other day we were also counting up the places he has lived, and it was quite an impressive total for a seven year old. He started life in Wakefield (1), moved swiftly here to Hove (2) when he was four months old and his father disappeared, then they moved into Son's flat in Brighton (3) and lived happily there for a couple of years. Next they left Brighton and moved to Dorking (4) with the ex-boyfriend (big mistake - huge). A year ago last Christmas they moved swiftly back here to Hove (5) where they stayed with me for 7 months, and then moved into a shared house in Hanover (6) with Daughter's friend, which lasted precisely a year, and they have now moved into a flat on their own, also in Hanover (7), which is near his new school. Bless the boy, that's 7 homes in 7 years. I bloody hope this one sticks, because they could both do with a bit of stability. It's no wonder he loves coming to stay here with me; I guess it's the one place that doesn't change in his little life.

I have been on a mini-jaunt up to London this weekend to stay with a London BF. I drove up in brilliant sunshine, and we had some lunch in her lovely garden before walking round the corner to see an open-air performance of "The Importance of being Earnest". I love Oscar Wilde, well, I love his wit,and it was a very good and funny production. We sat with glasses of wine and laughed in all the usual places. Then we sat in her garden again, catching up on all the gossip until it was almost dark. This morning we breakfasted in the garden again, and then went to a London Car Boot Sale where the heavens promptly opened and soaked us literally to the skin! Sadly, it meant we couldn't meet up with Son for a drink, as we had to beat a hasty retreat and change into dry clothes. Never mind - though I did mind really, I so wanted to see Son, however briefly, because his busy working schedule and his jet-setting back and forth to Poland (I actually wrote Pooland there!) and his girlfriend mean that we see very little of him. And he's off again very soon - he's flying to Pooland on his very Birthday (16th September). Carole King said it perfectly in her song "Far Away". "Doesn't anybody stay in one place any more?" Me and Grandson too - we both need a bit of solid ground...