Wednesday, May 20, 2009

In the midst of Life....

Well, so mucho for good intentions, I've been even worse at Blogging since I came home. To be fair, it has been a frantic ten days, but I must stop making excuses and just get on with it!

The first 10 days with my new Student have been fine. She is a nice little 22 year old Swiss girl whose native language is French. She had a bit of trouble settling in when she discovered that I didn't have Wi-Fi and so she couldn't connect to her beloved lap-top, and her beloved friends, 24 hours a day. The beautiful bottom lip trembled, and a crystal tear appeared in the corner of her eye. But I was implacable - not to say tough. I tried to explain that it wasn't a case of money - I just don't know my neighbours well enough to knock on their doors and ask if we can used their Wi-Fi connection - and anyway, I'm not sure how that would work. It was fine once she went into School, and they sorted her out I guess, because I didn't hear another word about it! Apart from that, we are getting along famously, and her parents are coming to stay this weekend. It will be interesting, as they apparently don't speak a word of English. It may turn into a French Farce, and if it does, I'll share the fun with you.

The very sad news came when I telephoned my lovely Solicitor, ironically as it turned out, to ask him to bring my Will up to date. When he answered the phone he sounded very down, so I asked him what was wrong - only to hear that his lovely wife had died, in April, of breast cancer, or rather the results of a late diagnosis of breast cancer, and the ensuing operations, chemotherapy and finally inoperable brain tumours. I was devastated and terribly sad for him. She was only 42, and has left three children (11, 16 and 17) and a sad and lonely husband. He was obviously trying to be brave, but I'm afraid I cried, and so did he in the end. Words are totally inadequate when something like this happens - and it is so terribly unfair that someone so young should be wrenched away from her family and a full and happy life. I knew that she had been ill, and had had to have reconstructive surgery after a mastectomy, but I had assumed (and hoped) that she would survive. Oh Bugger.

My 8th Therapy session last Friday was a tough one, which brought up some deeply buried family stuff. It took me completely by surprise because I just didn't see it coming, and I ended up feeling rather threatened. I came home exhausted and slept again, and then spent the night in a state of anxiety. I can't really explain it, because it's rather close to home, but my protective instincts were aroused not only for my two grown-up children, but also for my Therapist who is taking this stuff on. Having re-read this, I can see that it isn't making any sense at all. Sorry...

Grandson was here again, last weekend, and we were hoping to go to the Jill Windmill on Sunday to see her working. Actually we did go, but the weather closed down on us and we sat in the car for nearly an hour, waiting for the storm to abate slightly. We tried to get out once, but were beaten back by the howling wind and rain, so in the end we retreated and came home. Daughter came to pick him up on Monday afternoon (he had an extra day with me), and rushed in with her mobile glued to her ear - looking gorgeous - and hurrying Grandson along because she was going out to dinner. Again. There's obviously something going on because she never has a moment to stop and talk, and poor Grandson is rushed from pillar to post to fit in with her social arrangements. Add to that the fact that she has bought a bright red convertible car (I know, don't ask!), and is planning a holiday without Grandson (guess who gets to look after him) but with the Boyfriend, because he is paying!!! She is avoiding all conversations about the future in any real sense, and acting as if nothing has happened. Not only that, but when I went to their house last week, I was confronted with the most disgustingly dirty tip, five kittens and their mum, and a fridge you wouldn't want to touch if you valued your health. After half an hour I couldn't breathe (allergic asthma) and when she came home I left saying that I wasn't going back at least while the kittens are there. It's all rather a worry. But of course I can't say anything without being in the wrong again.

On a happier note, I had a lovely visit from my London BF, whom I met on Skyros in 2001, and who came to stay on Monday. She arrived just in time to say a cheery hello to Grandson, and then we had a wonderful time catching up. She had brought real Madeira cake, from Madeira, and some potent Madeira Wine. We ate, drank and talked non-stop until we could talk no more, and then we resumed next morning over breakfast before going for a walk along by the sea. She had tickets for a BAFTA special event at the Brighton Dome yesterday evening, to see David Attenborough talking about his life. There was a Champagne Reception first, with very good champagne and tasty canapes, so we felt very spoilt. And the on-stage Interview, with Melvin Bragg doing the interviewing, was so good we both felt it could have gone on much longer. David Attenborough really is a Great British Institution. Afterwards she had to whizz off to her Mum's as they were going to the Chelsea Flower Show today, but it was a fabulous visit.

Now I'm off to bed - feeling very lucky to be alive and kicking...


aims said...

For someone who hasn't blogged in a while you sure fit in quite a bit in this one. I feel like I've been for a cuppa!

It will be interesting to see what is happening with your daughter.....

auntiegwen said...

Nothing like a good chat with a friend is there ? Obv chat+cake+alcohol isn't too shabby ! x

Working mum said...

Oooooo David Attenborough! I worshipped him as a child; I so wanted his job. I've just bought his autobiography as I've always felt he was an interesting person. So jealous!

Donna said...

Ahhhh...You know how they are when they want to do what They want to do come hell or high water...and it's probably not a good thing she's up to because she knows you'll fuss.
I guess it's her lesson to learn. You just worry about getting lots of "sugars" from Grandson...hughugs

family affairs said...

How sad about his wife - hope therapy helping - don't forget your advice to me about mine! Keep things in perspective Lx

The Vintage Kitten said...

Oh dear Im so sorry to read about your solicitors wife. Its tragic especially at such a young age. We have had a family member go through this and thankfully she is in remission and has been for about 3 years, its such a dreadful illness. Hope your therapy sessions are helping, though Im sure they are difficult I darent get started on my family 'stuff' as there are alot of issues but I prefer to bury my head in the sand. Thanks for popping by, I hope you got a LARGE bottle of Amaretto X

Maggie May said...

That was a very chatty post and I caught up with all your news!
Very sad about the solicitors wife and leaving 3 young children.
Glad your Swiss lodger is OK now that you got the croc tears out of the way. You must be able to write a book about your lodgers by now.

Robynn's Ravings said...

So sad about your solictor's wife. Ugh. Have three dear friends who have beat this and one who did not. Very tough.

How nice of you to host your student's parents. Sounds like a good blog post will write itself!

Cheers! :)

A Mother's Place is in the Wrong said...

Hi aims, grovelling apologies for the delay in responding. Yes, I know what you mean about dropping in for a cuppa - it's that nice, cosy feeling.

Things with Daughter seem to be at a standstill - we just have to wait and see! M xxx

Hi Auntie gwen - please see above for apologies. I must give myself a proper talking-to! But it was a great get-together, and the alcohol and the cake just made it perfect! M xxx

Dear Working Mum, yes he was just lovely - rather scruffy and normal, if you know what I mean. It was a super evening - and the Champagne made it perfect. M xxx

Dear Donna - you know you're always right - there's something going on there that I'm not meant to know about. I have Grandson here, so lots of kisses are coming my way. M xxx

Thanks Lulu, you're right about keeping things in perspective. So sad about Solicitor's wife - he's such a dear. M xxx

Hi TVK, so lovely of you to come over and comment - yes, it's a terrible thing, and obviously affects so many families. Actually, the Therapy is definitely helping, but it has been tough to get through. A strange combination, but it's surprising how optimistic I'm feeling. Amaretto is loverly...
(I'm beginning to sound as if I'm always drinking...) M :-)

Dear Maggie, how lovely to hear from you. Yes, I feel so sad for him. And I'm glad you enjoyed catching up - it's almost like having a gossip, isn't it?
Yes, I guess I could write a book about them all - it would be funny!
M xxx

Dear Robynn's Ravings, how nice of you to drop by and to comment. This sad story seems to strike a lot of chords - so many people are affected by this dreadful disease.
Actually the Hosting is fun - and of course I do get paid for it - and it gives me lots of laughs..
But if only Blog Posts wrote themselves! M xxx